Dyspraxia, SPD and a Child's Work

Jam is currently 4.75 years old

Traditionally, it's been put forth that a child's work is to go to school. But my son does not go to school. Instead, Jam's week is filled with various formal and non-formal therapies like OT, swimming, hippotherapy, gymnastics, yoga, etc. All of these, together with his regularly scheduled playdates with a few good friends, make up his week. And this week makes up his schooling. And while swimming and gymnastics and yoga all sound like great fun, in actuality, it's also a lot of hard work for him.

When Jam was younger, I referred to his occupational therapy appointments as 'play' because, from his point of view, that's what they were. Lots of fun and games. And, back then, I was still trying to get buy-in from him. Today, it still is fun and games. But as he's gotten older, I've been making the shift to praise him for all of the effort and energy he puts into his 'work'. His 'work' at therapy, at the pool, at the playground.

"You've been working so hard!'

"You did amazing work at Miss S's today!"

And here's why-

I want him to see that work can be fun. Too often, 'work' carries a negative connotation- that it's, by definition, not fun, certainly not to be enjoyed and not something we'd be doing if given a better choice. That's not an association I want Jam to make, especially as a dyspraxic and given that he's going to be working hard at many things for much of his life.

I also think that using the word 'work' helps get Jam in the mindset that, while much of his life is pleasant and fun, there are also times when he needs to focus and put in serious effort because, in the end, we're spending all of this time and energy trying to accomplish something very serious.

And, lastly, by acknowledging all of the time, energy and effort that he puts in-  I want him to recognize that what he is doing is hard work and that it is legitimate and real and that he should be proud of himself. To call it anything else would be to dishonor him.