Jam is 4.75 years old
It sounds crazy but if I had to have a kid with dyspraxia I am so glad to have it myself. It may seem counter-intuitive because, being dyspraxic, I am a bit prone to fear and anxiety and could worry myself sick about Jam and his prospects and all that. But I don't.
I don't because I know he's going to be fine. And I know he's going to be fine because I'm fine and he's getting a lot more help and support that I ever did.
Here are some concerns specific to dyspraxia and SPD that I'm not concerned about:
Limited food palate- Like Jam now, there wasn't much I willingly ate when I was young. On top of that, I had a bunch of food habits that would drive my mom up a wall, like only eating one thing on my plate at a time and moving my plate clock-wise when it was time to move to the next food item. (OCD, anyone?) I'm not sure why it bothered her so much but, as a result, my mom would always threaten to put my food in a blender and mix it all up and make me drink it unless I started intermingling the bites of food on my plate. On top of that, there was always the 'you're not leaving this table until you finish your…..' business. Everything had to be eaten no matter how long it took. And it could take a long, long time. Meals were, obviously, filled with anxiety and power struggles.
It wasn't until after I'd grown up and moved away that I started trying new foods. On my own, when I was ready and with no pressure. And now I love eating most everything. I'd like this to happen for Jam a lot sooner than it did for me so we don't use a lot of coercion in our house where food is concerned. He's got enough healthy items in his repertoire that he's not malnourished. It will be easier for him to overcome the mental blocks regarding new food smells and textures when he's older. And that's good enough for me right now.
Weight- Jam has always been a solid, heavy guy. He was born 5 weeks early but measured in at a normal birth weight so they let us go home the next day. And now that he's eating more readily, he's only gotten more solid and more heavy. To the point that his pediatrician says he's in the 80th percentile. It's not the number of calories being taken in, it's the number of calories not being burned off due to low energy. There's not a lot of energy left over when you use it all up doing regular day-to-day things.
Don't worry, though- the pediatrician's not concerned and is not recommending any course of action. And I'm mostly not worried either. I was a chunky monkey myself. Not to the point of obesity or poor health or anything. Just on the heavier side. I see Jam's round 'buddha belly' in all of my own baby photos. But then puberty kicked in and I slimmed down. And now I rock a bootcamp-style fitness class 4 times a week.
(I will admit, though, to stealthily portioning and limiting Jam's much-beloved pasta and bread!)
Posture- The constant nags of 'Sit up!' and 'Stop slouching!' still ring in my ears to this day. But it never had more than a minute's impact back then. It just was not possible for me to hold straight posture for more than a minute. You know what did last more than a minute? The years of constant criticism chipping away at self-esteem. That habitual feeling that everything about me was wrong and that I couldn't do anything good enough- including stand up straight.
Don't worry- my posture improved as I aged and got stronger. And so did my self-esteem!
Jam, of course, also slouches, especially while floor sitting and he also has always carried his shoulders up by his ears. (I think he was really scrunched in the womb!) It's all improved slowly as he's gotten stronger but when he's really tired or stressed, those shoulders start upwards again. Sometimes, I'll bring his attention to it- how those 'wily shoulders of his are trying to climb into his ears again' and he'll laugh and relax a bit. No nagging or pointed looks of disapproval. Of course, I want his posture to improve and it will, but I'm not going to subtly beat down his confidence over it.
Tip-Toeing (or Toe-Walking)- It used to be that tip-toeing, in and of itself, raised all sorts of scary red flags. I used to tip-toe a lot as a kid and still do sometimes- the sensory input feels good. Jam still does it occasionally but I don't freak out. In fact, it seems to coincide with his developmental leaps which makes sense and is a good thing.
I also don't worry about if Jam will ever someday learn to ride a bike or drive a car. They weren't easy for me to accomplish but they did happen and I'm thinking up ways that might make it easier for him. More in line with how his body works and how his brain learns.
He'll progress on his and in his own time. Until then, no worries here!
No comments :
Post a Comment